Is It Rude To Unfollow/Unfriend? What Are The Rules?

Photo: NZexporter

If you are following a lot of people on Twitter or Facebook then your news feed tends to get quite noisy. And busy. And to be honest, full of quite a lot of stuff that really you aren't all that interested in.

But the problem is, these people followed you, so you were polite and followed them back (or on Facebook you accepted their friend request) so if you Unfollow or Unfriend them isn't that just a bit rude? Just a teeny weeny bit?

Here's a question for you. If you bump into someone at the supermarket who you haven't seen for years - you might stop and have a good old natter, maybe swap phone numbers and say 'we must catchup'. But after that chance meeting, you don't really have much to say to each other. Will you actually call them? Probably not. And why? Because your life has changed and you are into different things now. Doesn't mean you don't like them, just means you have a lot of other stuff crammed into your life already which takes priority.

Same with Twitter or Facebook. If there is someone there that you used to engage with when you first connected, but not so much anymore.... well maybe its just that you are into different things? And if you aren't engaging with someone and you have different interests then really whats the point in being connected?

I do periodic culls of Twitter and Facebook. On Twitter I also use lists - you don't need to be following someone to list them - so that's one way of grouping them off to one side and taking them out of my main feed. On Facebook, I restrict it to keeping in touch with friends and family (sorry to those people whose friend requests I have never accepted - now you know why). Doesn't mean I don't like these people - just that we don't have common interests right now.

Everyone changes - if we all stayed the same then we'd be boring.

Its not rude. Its not the end of the world. Its just life.

And you will probably enjoy checking your Facebook and Twitter feeds a lot more when its not cluttered up with stuff you don't want to hear about.          

    

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Tips On How To Get The Most Out Of TweetDeck

There are a plethora of apps available for managing your Twitter life, and I've used a few but keep coming back to TweetDeck.

Why?

Well, a few reasons. It depends a lot on how you use Twitter, but I find TweetDeck suits me.

Here are my top 5 reasons for using TweetDeck:

1. It has an autocomplete/lookup function for Twitter names of all the people you are following. No need to guess someone's Twitter handle and have your tweet go off into a black hole because of a mis-spelling (on Twitter, there is no bounce back to tell you that you got the address wrong!). And really, who can be bothered to go and lookup the correct name somewhere else? That's one of the drawbacks of Twitter web (which only shows 500 names - and its never the 500 you want) or Twitter for Mac (which shows absolutely none thank you very much).

2. There is an automatic url shortener which can use your bit.ly account (or tiny.url and a few others). Makes it super easy to copy and paste a url, have it shortened and still be able to access the analytics. If you share a lot of links to content (as I do) then this is important. You can also use your Twitpic, Yfrog or Posterous accounts for uploading images.

3. Its got a built in spell check. Admittedly it is American spelling, but its better than none. Might save your bacon one day.

4. You can use the old and new style retweets - you can choose each time you RT. Love that flexibility -  sometimes you want to add a comment onto the RT (if there is sufficient room) and being able to choose how you RT is excellent.

5. TweetDeck shows your RTs. Twitter web doesn't do this very obviously - you need you go to Retweets > Your Tweets, Retweeted to see them - but Tweetdeck will show them in your Mentions column.

Extra Tweetdeck Features
There are also a lot of extra features in TweetDeck that you may not be aware of, even if you are a long time TweetDeck user. Here are my favs:


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Tweeting and Followers: More Twitter Tips.

Tweeting

Its surprising how many articulate, well educated and confident people suddenly feel quite self conscious when composing their first tweet. “But what should I tweet??” they cry, wringing their fingers over the keyboard, anxiety etched on their poor wee faces. Stage fright. Big time.

Not wanting to burst your bubble but when you do finally send your first tweet, its highly likely that no-one is listening so no-one will even see your cleverly crafted 140 character debut flit through the virtual world. This is actually a good thing. Think of it as a dummy run, a trial. No pressure whatsoever. (I should point out that once tweeted, your tweet is captured in Twitter history forever and one day when you are more famous than Gaga someone will dredge up your first tweet for all to see. But seriously, don’t over think it. Just do it!). 

There are a few types of tweeting styles on Twitter:

• Some Twitter accounts have tweet counts in the single digits but following huge numbers of accounts - they are either spam orstalkers. Neither is desirable. Avoid being mistaken for one.
• Some people are conversationalists on Twitter - they spend most of their time chatting to other people and may have a lot of tweets. They probably use foursquare a lot and could be accused of over sharing. If you want to be one of those people you will probably already own at least one iPhone and will need chargers stashed in every corner of your house, car, or workplace. 
• Some people share content on Twitter - links to blogs, news articles, websites - if you are someone who scours the web and consumes a lot of information, you may be one of these people.
• Some people provide content - they may be bloggers, thought leaders or respected in their industry and they will provide original posts and tweets to be shared with the community.
• And some people are just damn famous. You know who I mean.

Decide which one of these (or a mix) you would like to be on Twitter and then get tweeting!

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Twitter Overload. More Tips for Newbies

If you read my previous post, you’ll now be happily following loads of Twitter accounts and watching the wave of tweets scroll through your Twitter timeline. Until you become overwhelmed. The common cry at this stage is ‘How do you keep up with all these tweets? I don’t have time to read them all!! This is so stressful!”  

Don’t panic. After all, you are probably following 100 or 200 Twitter accounts. Some people follow thousands, and are still alive to tweet about it the following day along with their breakfast details.

I once read a post (sorry, can’t remember who wrote it. If it was you then thank you!) that described Twitter as ’ a river not a lake’. These are very wise words to remember. Think of Twitter as a river and just dip in and out of the stream as it flows past. Don’t treat it like a lake where all the tweets are pooled and you must read them all. Anything meant specially for you will be in your Mentions tab. Anything else is just meant for everyone. There is not a test at the end.

Of course you will find there are a few people whose tweets you would like to see (or most of them anyway). Its an awkward moment when they say ‘did you see my tweet?’ and then all they can hear are crickets. My tip here is to make a few Twitter lists of your own.

Twitter lists are great. You can choose whether they are private (hidden) or public (allowing other people to see them and follow them).  You might create a list for all your friends and family. Or for competitors in your industry. Or for funny accounts that make you laugh. Some applications likeTweetdeck(my fav) or Hootsuite (my not-so-fav) allow you to view multiple lists in columns across the dashboard screen so you feel like you have your own mini Gatorade Command Centre. Oh the power!

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New to Twitter. What now?

Lately there has been a spurt of activity in the office with lots of new people joining Twitter (after a LOT of encouragement). After grumbling for a while, they sign up, follow Lady Gaga and Justin Bieber and then inevitably the question is asked 'Soooo...what now? Who do I follow?'.  So for those of you who are new to Twitter, here's a few tips on finding interesting people to follow.

1. First off, stand up and ask loudly "Is anyone else here on Twitter'. This works best if you are in an office or surrounded by people you know. It works not so well when in the middle of the supermarket or at the doctors. (believe me).  Twitter is rapidly gaining in popularity (over 190m users) so chances are there are a few people who you know who are already very familiar with the ins and outs of this micro blogging platform. Ask them who they enjoy following then check these people out for yourself. Ask your Facebook friends too.

2. Import all your email contacts and let Twitter see if the people who you email are also on Twitter. Instant party. Same with your LinkedIn connections (different kind of party).

3. Go to search.twitter.com and search for topics that interest you. Maybe 'iPhones' or 'photography'. Or 'UX'. Whatever is your passion. Take a look at some of the people who come up in the search and follow them.

4. Go to www.klout.com. Take a look at some of the people who you know of on Twitter by entering their name in the search box. Have a look at who these people are influenced by (klout displays these) and follow them. For example @mashable is influenced by @benparr (one of the editors of the Mashable blog).

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LinkedIn: A Few Tips. And a Few Grumbles.

LinkedIn. Whats that all about? Isn't it just for people who are looking for a job? 

No. No. No.

LinkedIn is more than that. Its a great way to make new business connections, its your always-up-to-date Rolodex for contacts and email addresses, it's good for discussion groups with like minded professionals around the world and the best part is seeing who has checked out your profile. We all love that bit.

There are now 101 million users on LinkedIn (including 400,000 from right here in NZ). Not quite as many as the 500 million or more on Facebook, but still - quite a lot of people. Nearly 60% of them are male - more than your average social network which tend to be favoured by women. Why is that you ask? Well thats another blog....!!

LinkedIn has a high Google Page Ranking so its worthwhile having your profile there as its likely to be one of the top search results when someone Googles your name. (Try it and see. Go on). 

Through LinkedIn, I've been approached to present at overseas conferences, had some of my blog posts published in NZ magazines, and connected with people around the world in similar industries who I would never had had the opportunity to meet.

Here are a few tips on how to use it if you are new to LinkedIn.

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